Homeschool Mom Spotlight #11
Meet Tanya
Every month here at Patterns for Life we highlight an individual homeschool mom through a written interview in order to encourage and inspire our readers. We know it can be helpful to meet — whether virtually or in real life — other mothers who are in the trenches with us here and now, and can relate to our daily struggles and joys.
This month we are pleased to introduce Tanya, who is living out her homeschool adventure in the Pacific Northwest. Enjoy reading her responses!
1. Tell us about yourself and your family.
My name is Tanya (St. Monica) and I am an Orthodox Christian mom of three sons in 7th, 3rd, and Kinder grades (Forms 3, 1, and 0). We live in the Pacific Northwest where we sing together, bake prosphora, forage for mushrooms, and participate in parish life. Two of my boys serve as acolytes and I sing in the choir when I can.
I’m in a new season of motherhood and homeschooling as a single mom. In my not-so-spare time, I work as an editor for The Good and the Beautiful, and am on the copy editing team for Common Place Quarterly and Soul Gardening Journal. I’m dipping my toes back into writing, a little at a time.
2. How long have you been homeschooling and what motivated you to start in the first place?
I’ve homeschooled for eight years! After college, I was hired as an assistant in a Montessori school and began cultivating an understanding of childhood development and education through a Montessori lens—which I still love! Where some may see conflict between Maria Montessori’s methods and Charlotte Mason’s methods, I see two persons who worked with vastly different demographics and sought to uplift the children God placed in front of them—and that praxis rightly looked different!
Many families in our church at the time homeschooled their children, and most followed Charlotte Mason’s method, but I struggled with her Protestant-ism. We were slowly moving toward Orthodox Christianity (although we didn’t know about the Orthodox Church yet), and Mason’s philosophy didn’t make sense to me entirely yet. I kept learning.
At the end of the day, I (and my husband at the time) wanted a more connected and expansive education for our children, and homeschooling Miss Mason’s way felt like a good fit!
3. Describe a typical homeschool day in your home.
This season of transition has drastically changed “typical” and I feel intimidated by this question! We shoot for a home-day standard—waking early, making coffee and breakfast, and then heading outside for movement (or inside movement if it’s intolerable outdoors). Boys have a burst of testosterone first thing in the morning, so getting them to burn that off before settling in for lessons allows focused energy.
Mondays are light—we reconnect with tea and cinnamon rolls, and reading. There are piano lessons in the afternoon, and then game night.
One day per week we take classes at our local Christian homeschool center where my boys participate in chess club, athletics, and ceramics. Most Thursdays we attend Divine Liturgy at our parish and every other Friday is co-op. It feels like a lot, but it’s been very anchoring.
My 7th grader is mostly self-directed, which allows me the time to alternate between my 3rd grader and my Kinder-boy. These two take Lego breaks or do “Salamander Yoga” videos on YouTube (5 minutes, very cute) while I work with the other. The oldest has daily math, reading, co-op homework, and Russian language class or practice. The younger two do math and language arts daily, and then we’ll try something creative like clay modeling or watercolor.
Ideally, we’re finished after lunch and they have chores and free time and that’s when I can get started on my work for the day.
4. What is your favorite part of homeschooling?
It might sound simple, but my favorite part of homeschooling is being with my kids. We drive each other nuts, we work on relational skills, we take walks and hikes and go to the river. And, I’m grateful that THEY are with ME! There is so much freedom in the recognition that my children are learning with me, and I’m learning with them, and we’re together and safe doing it. I’m so grateful.
5. Does homeschooling affect the way you parent? If so, how?
I’m still learning to be a mother-teacher. The teacher part comes naturally, but it wasn’t until my marriage ended that I began to explore the ways I hadn’t been able to mother my children well. Learning to nurture myself makes me feel confident in nurturing my children, which helps them feel safe and confident to learn with me and from me—because I’m becoming more of myself, they can become themselves too.
6. What is your least favorite part of homeschooling?
Being talked at all day and always being “on.” I love what they have to say, and we’re working on boundaries and self control so that we can all hear each other and be heard. I also need time and space to think and reset—relational boundaries aren’t meant to keep people out, they’re for offering freedom for those within.
7. What have you found to be the most humbling aspect of parenting/homeschooling?
I’m not responsible for making anyone become anything. I’m not tasked with saving anybody, including my kids, educationally or otherwise. The Holy Spirit teaches my children, the Mother of God and their guardian angels guide them, I am but a vessel. It’s quite freeing.
8. Looking back to the beginning of your homeschool journey, what are some things you wish you had known? What would you tell your younger self as she was just starting out?
We’re sharpening arrows, not perfecting aim. I was reminded years ago that we miss a major part of “train up a child in the way be should go” and it’s “when he is OLD he shall not depart from it.” When he’s old, I’m dead. I’m out of the way, no longer setting stumbling blocks in the path of my child.
9. How does your faith affect your homeschooling?
On the best days, it forms the foundation: prayers, Saints, spiritual conversations, mountain top experiences. On the other days, it forms the foundation too: Lord-have-mercys and asking forgiveness. Becoming Orthodox is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and it will be the hardest thing my boys ever do. We spend a lot of time talking about how we become like Christ in every task. Hands to work, hearts to God.
10. What are some of your favorite homeschool resources?
People! The Lord has brought us a diverse community to learn with and from, and we live in a city with many opportunities to find experts in anything. “That sounds like a great question for ____, let’s ask.”
I pull from Ambleside Online, Mater Amabilis (their booklists are phenomenal), and The Good and the Beautiful (I don’t get paid to say that). The Good and the Beautiful isn’t Charlotte Mason, or classical, but it is easy to use—we use their math courses. In this season, it works for us.
Books we love:
Wonderland of Nature by Nuri Mass
Any book by Jim Arnosky
The Living Year by Richard Headstrom
Friends of Christ series from New Rome Press
Elder Cleopa Stories for Children series
11. What do you consider to be the most rewarding aspect of homeschooling?
The most rewarding aspect of homeschooling is watching my kids become beautifully social and expansive people. They have diverse interests and express a desire to find common ground with others. I’m so proud of us.
12. Anything else you’d like to add?
Keep track of your mottoes, write in a Commonplace journal—these can be anchors in times of transition or struggle because they tether us to the true, good, and beautiful. Review them, print them, place them before your eyes so they become a part of the inner narrative of your family.
Here are a few of mine:
Just do the next right thing.
O Lord, make haste to help me.
Just add water/fire (family time around the fire pit or trips to the river do wonders for resetting our systems)
“Every emotion is an opportunity for a conversation with God.” – St. Sophrony of Essex
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord my Rock and my Redeemer.” Psalm 19:14 (This was MY elementary school verse and it’s now our homeschool and family verse.)
Thank you, Tanya! I just love your observation about Maria Montessori and Charlotte Mason being two different people in different places who worked out what the children placed in their care needed to thrive in their own unique ways. That’s one of the primary reasons we started this spotlight series: to highlight how home education can be as diverse and unique as each family is!